Approaching a possible wife
December 14, 2009 ·
Ustadh Answered by Zaynab Ansari, Abdul-Razacq
Question: You said: "If you see someone who would like to discuss for marriage and have no idea who this person is or how to contact his family, common sense would dictate that some form of communication." My question is: Can a man talks to a girl and get to know about your personal things without the consent and knowledge of his guardian? The reason why I am asking this question because is very easy to fall and get intimate with others. If this happens, the man proposes to her and the keeper denied, there may be problems. Is not it better to let the tutor know about this from day one?
Answer: In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah, Lord of the universe. May peace and blessings of God will descend on the Prophet Muhammad, his family, his companions and those who follow.
Dear Brother, Assalamu alaikum
,
Thank you for your follow-up question. Glad you're on the same page. I am certainly not encouraging young people to speak without knowledge of their parents. I think you understand the point I'm doing. As a young man and a woman talking in public about legitimate issues, we can not say that such conversations are illegal. I'm not encouraging people to form relationships and be intimate. I'm saying it does not hurt to ask discreetly if the other person and his family are open to the topic of marriage. If you wish to contact the girl's family, helps to ask (or someone who knows her) how to contact your tutor. Surely you do not have to have any conversation. And if the environment is such that people are easy to fall and make mistakes, then you definitely should follow all conversations with her in front of his family.
Again, what I'm talking about is discreet, friendly conversation, which will help you assess whether there is any basis for even discussing marriage. You do not want to approach the family of the girl without knowing anything of it, then you realize that's not what you are looking for, then the family is hurt. This may also occur.
May Allah reward you,
Zaynab Ansari, Abdul-Razacq
December 10, 2009
Dhul-Hijjah 23, 1430
Reviewed and Approved by Faraz Rabbani
Extracted from Guidance Seekers
http://seekersguidance. org/ans-blog/2009/12/14/approaching-a-potential-spouse /
0 comments:
Post a Comment